May 17, 2007,Yes, I can remember that day. Although, my memory is less than what it used to be. I worked a 12 hour shift at work, came home and went to bed. I awoke at 6am {mind you I didn't get in bed until 4am} with a horrible pain in the back of my head. I shook my ex-husband (yes, ex-husband for a reason...reason you guessed it my MS) he awoke from his stupor, to tell me to take a shower to see if I felt better. Wth, I thought I will give it a shot. I got in the shower and fell because of the dizziness, my vision was doing something weird as well. The sound of me falling didn't wake him. (Imagine that and I was in the master bath) I managed to kick the bed. He didn't move. Finally, with all the strength I had in me I pushed on him while wincing in pain from my head to get up. Finally, he woke only to tell me to take a Tylenol and rolled back over. TYLENOL? WTF? Yes, Dr. Dipshit I will get right the fuck on that! I admit it, I then knocked the ever living shit out of him. And, I have to say I am NOT one bit sorry for it! I yell at him, "Get the fuck up now I am dying". And yes, I indeed thought I was dying. Apparently, the act of me dying and him having to explaining what happened to me to the authorities provoked him enough to finally get the fuck up.

Anyhow, I called my mom on the way there and asked her to meet me at the hospital. I had to drive. Yes, I had to drive with one eye cupped by my hand because my left eye was to vasoleny {the correct medical term is optic neuritis} to see out of and the pain in my head continued to make its presence known. When I finally arrived at the ER, they took me straight back and proceeded to run a myriad of tests. A Cat Scan [CT] was not sufficient, I had to have Magnetic Resource Imaging [MRI]. I did so and was terrified of the MRI, as I am claustrophobic. I was informed that radiologist needed another look (another MRI) and I freaked slap the fuck out. I was in pain and terrified of everything happening around me. My mother was begging me to calm down. The doctor, namely Fleming,MD, knocked me out with Demerol and Valium. WTG on that one, doc! Well played..WTG

When I came to the nurse was in the room with my paperwork. She said, "Tiffani, honey, you have MS" while reaching the paperwork to my mother. I said, "ok" still sitting there letting her words sink in. She says, "You have got to see a local neurologist tomorrow at 9am". I said without hesitation, "I can't I have to work". She looked at me and said adamantly, "You don't understand this is your life and you must keep the appointment". I protested! However, my mother had none of it. 

Needless to say, I kept the appointment. At the appointment, I was told I was to advanced for them to treat and I was sent 5 hours away to the University of Kentucky hospital. I haven't worked another day since then. It kills me even now, no doctor has allowed my return to gainful activity. I am attempting now, to have my current MD sign forms to allow me to go back to college at least. I had an appointment earlier in the month of May to discuss the next step in treating this debilitating illness. One day I hope to announce that I am on my way to the MS specialist to obtain the cure. Until then raising awareness about MS (locally and worldwide), attempting to slow the progression and treating the symptoms will have to suffice. Sadly, there is no guarantee anything will slow down this damn MonSter.