Dear friends, It is with deep sadness and depression that I write this. For the last month I have started to regress to worse than what I was before.  As you may remember I went for jugular reconstruction in Mexico with Dr. Hernendez. Immediately I had great recovery in many areas. My hands and feet and hands were 70-90% back to normal, my vision corrected and I had no more headaches. I was doing great until one day in early Oct. I woke up and had noticed that my hand was more numb. At first I thought that I must have slept on it funny and dismissed it. The next morning I woke up with a extremely painful pounding headache. OH NO! I knew then something was wrong, I only get those headaches when I have blockage.  So far the days that followed I have steadily gotten worse. I can no longer feel my feet and my hands they are very numb. The numbness has now reached my upper thighs. My headaches are coming more often now and I can only sleep for 2-3 hrs at a time. Given my past experience I know something has gone wrong. I called my Dr. in Mexico and he said that he would need to see a CAT scan to see what is wrong, possibly my new vein has folded over it self, a blood clot or it has somehow gotten blocked. Without a scan or a MRV there is no way for him to tell. In Canada no MRV will be done as we don't do that procedure here, I am on a wait list for a CAT but my Dr. here said that it will be a month before one will get done. Then it will take even longer to send that down to Mexico for the Dr. to read it.  In the mean time I am going down fast, soon the numbness will reach my groin and my stomach area.  I am now very afraid that it will reach my neck , heart and lung area and then what? Trouble swallowing, breathing, WHO KNOWS? I was doing so well for almost 5 months but it didn't last. I know that it has done so well for others and I'm so very happy for them.  Why me? What is it about me that angio and now vein reconstruction has not worked. If anyone thinks that vein reconstruction is a permanent fix to a blood flow problem, I just found out that it isn't. I guess that's why we do this, to add to the research surrounding this new procedure. I know that if I do have a blood clot and it comes lose, I could die, just like my mother did from her M.S. when when one and it came loose and when to her lung. I am not the type to give up but I just don't have the finances to do this again right now or maybe ever.  I'm terrified that I will remain like this or worse until I can do something. What makes me so depressed is that when you have something so good happen for the second time and then is ripped away from you, it's so disheartening. My husband and son are filled with hope that maybe we could all have a small chance at a "normal" family life for a change, they both try so hard to help me and that breaks my heart to see them lose hope too. I try not to cry so often in front of them but it's getting harder not to do so when my son keeps asking me all the time "MOM ARE YOU GOING TO DIE LIKE GRANDMA DID?  I tell him "no" but I know that I really don't know for sure.  Sorry if I sound so negative but I am, I'm just doing my  reporting honestly like I promised I would.  Norma